Recovering from trauma and addiction is more than getting clean. You’ve got to face the reasons why.
Why do addicts risk their lives on a daily basis “to escape reality”? Well, maybe people who ask this don’t have a reality they need to escape. It could be as simple as that. But, trauma and addiction are tied together.
Over the years of going in and out of rehabs, hospitals, and prisons AND observing people who I found myself in the company of, there are two recurring themes:
ONE: There is Some Type of Trauma
Most often in some form of abuse. Most often as a child. People self medicate their ills and most often do it unconsciously. Looking back, it is very easy to see my trauma and addiction connection. I was in a car accident that left me barely alive and in a lot of pain, with a new rebuilt face, and a traumatic brain injury (TBI). It was life altering. After that moment, I did everything I could to destroy that memory and pretend it never happened. But guess what? You can’t delete part of your life.
TWO: Trauma and Addiction – The Need To Avoid Feelings
In order to break the cycle, I had to spend some serious time sober and force myself to think about the things I had tried to hard to avoid: FEELINGS.
I had to feel that pain and just grieve. And cry. And loathe myself. What I learned is that once you feel it all the way through, you can make peace with it. As best you can.
A good indica is great to ease my PTSD. Especially at night.